22 years ago today I went for a check up with OB GYN. I was 36 weeks pregnant with my twins. He told me, much to my surprise, that he would see me the next morning bright and early to deliver them. In spite of being pregnant for a real long time and trying to get pregnant for months before that, I was really not ready yet. I started bargaining for another week to mentally prepare. NOPE.
“Meet me at 6 a.m.” he said.
And so I went home, nervous beyond measure to jam all of this information into my brain as best I could. The full moon shone in my skylight that night. It didn’t keep me awake, because I was already awake. It was a nice companion to my fears and angst however, and it turns out, was a lovely escort for the birth of my two Virgo children. These two people who would teach me more about myself than any others on this earth.
Sidebar, the moon happens to be the ruler of my birth chart and it is in the sign of Gemini, the symbol for which is twins.
Almost 2 years ago, I had surgery on my shoulder to repair two tears that had developed. I was pretty scared about the whole thing and was again, not really ready. I was afraid I would lose yoga, what if it didn’t work, would I tear it again? Would I ever do full wheel again? Yoga has been so much a part of my healing process in the last decade or so. What if, what IF!? This moon ruler of my chart being in Gemini also makes for a very active brain and overthinking process.
Today I was prepping for my yoga class this evening, and off and on since my surgery I have been trying to get back to the full wheel pose. If you are unfamiliar with yoga, it is essentially a bridge like pose that as an 8 year old, I am sure I busted out without worry or concern as I played in the grass with my friends. When I first started yoga as an adult, I watched as people did full wheel mesmerized with their flexibility and strength. I convinced myself if I could do it, I had won yoga. (This is funny because there are still 100+ poses I can NOT do, alas, I was always stuck on that one.) And really, yoga isn’t something you win at, it’s a practice that you evolve with.
I remember when I did my first full wheel. I do not remember the actual day or the outfit I had on, but the feeling I had when I actually did it. I was giddy with joy; so happy that I made it happen and proud of myself for having patience with my body. If I remember correctly, my teacher may have cheered for me, because I know she saw me struggle with it week after week on Sunday mornings. And then, just like that Wordle that pops out of nowhere, you land it. You get the word, you make the pose happen. Only it’s not out of nowhere, it is from patience, hard work, intention and practice. This is why I love yoga. It makes my Gemini moon brain take a backseat to my body and together we persevere regardless of the circumstances.
I have been very ginger with my repaired shoulder, perhaps overly ginger. And today, somehow, I managed to get my head off the ground during my practice. Not all the way there, but I also didn’t let my brain win this one. I let my shoulder alert me that it was OK to proceed and we got part of the way there.
Why am I sharing this with you? First, it is Virgo season. For me it’s a balancing time of the year, and it is a time of year I end up doing hard things. Is that random? Nope. That is a blog for another day. For all of us, Virgo season can be a healing, organizing, regrouping time of year. Second, I share this because each of us are a mix of energies that is unique and beautiful. When we learn to let the energies be what they are, instead of trying to force or change them, we start to soar. This is the essence of yoga, but it is also the essence of us as humans. The final reason I am sharing is because the magic of our essence and energy is conveniently and lovingly detailed in a map. This map is your birth chart. And when we begin to understand this treasure map, we start to thrive in general, working with the flow instead of against it. For example, my impatient Aries self with the overactive Gemini brain needs a practice like yoga that is both physical and still allows my brain to take a brief and well needed vacation. What does your self need? What planet rules your birth chart? What is a good time of year for you to do hard things? I would love to escort you along this discovery process to find what suits you best. There is a time and season for everything. Perhaps this is the time for you to start exploring your treasure map!